(Editor’s note: Factual information for ‘Tales’ is provided by the Josephine County Sheriff’s Office. All persons listed are innocent until proven guilty in a court of law. Charges can be amended or dismissed.)
Sunday, Oct. 2
*A bloody bloke in a 1992 Dodge Dakota was screaming and driving erratically through the parking lot near Sportsman Tavern at 7:03 p.m.
*A gal was in the back seat of a patrol car near milepost 20 of Hwy. 199 at 8:28 p.m. She wanted to speak to any officer that wasn’t arresting her. (Or one who would fall for her sob story?)
Monday, Oct. 3
*At 12:11 p.m. a report was filed for assault and theft after two incidents in the 700 block of Lone Mountain Drive. Mark Elliot Dildine had a felony warrant from Josephine County Sheriff’s Office (JCSO) for failure to appear (FTA) for unlawful possession of a weapon. Dildine was cited to appear in Josephine County Circuit Court (JCCC) Nov. 16.
*A fellow with a shaved head and a shotgun was filmed when he knocked down a security camera and threw it into bushes near the 200 block of Wild Park Lane Sept. 29.
Tuesday, Oct. 4
*At 5 p.m. on Oct. 1, a guy in the 1700 block of Lone Mountain Road plugged his ears to block the sound of dogs barking, but he was shouting and kicking their gate, which caused them to howl even more.
*At 10:51 a.m. a gal claimed a rock worth $200 was stolen from her front yard in the 100 block of Holton Creek Road. When she confronted a suspect, an argument escalated.
Wednesday, Oct. 5
*Amateur loan sharks near Kerby Mainline threatened to take parts from a truck instead of body parts from a guy that owed them money at 4:42 a.m.
*Hooligans peppered a Shop Smart employee with a salt gun at 3:48 p.m.
*A chap was unable to retrieve his 1997 Toyota Previa from the 100 block of Browntown Road at 3:50 p.m. He claimed he left his vehicle there because he was involved in a homicide and wasn’t in his right mind.
*At 4:37 p.m. a pebble-brain in a bikini threw rocks at passing cars and hit a school bus near Dollar General in Cave Junction. She was warned for disorderly conduct (DOC).
Thursday, Oct. 6
*Takoda Wade Richardson was detained in Josephine County Jail (JCJ) following his arrest near Redwood Hwy. and Golf Club Drive at 11:29 a.m. Richardson had a felony warrant from Jackson County Sheriff’s Office for FTA for first-degree burglary.
*Kyle James was taken into custody at 7:56 p.m. in the 100 block of Lone Mountain Road. James was detained in JCJ for probation violation.
*A man was deceased in the 4800 block of Waldo Road at 8:29 p.m.
*Matthew McTigue was passed out, and his red Subaru was parked awkwardly in front of a door in the 200 block of N. Redwood Hwy. at 9:28 p.m. McTigue was detained at Grants Pass Sobering Center and cited to appear in JCCC Nov. 17 for driving under the influence of intoxicants (DUII).
Friday, Oct. 7
*At 10:59 a.m. a chap in the 200 block of Hamilton Avenue was running around wearing nothing but an Army-green T-shirt. A skinny brunette wore only a black T-shirt near Washington Federal Bank at 12:45 p.m. (Casual Friday or laundry day?)
*A silver-colored cargo trailer contained a Honda generator, water pump, and brand-new seat covers when it was reported stolen from the 400 block of Airport Drive at 11:49 a.m.
*Tammy Hoppe was detained in JCJ following her arrest at 6:14 p.m. for restraining order violation (ROV) in the 100 block of E. O’Brien Street.
*A set of plates, cook stove top, and vacuum food sealer were stolen from the 33100 block of Redwood Hwy., per a complaint received at 6:38 p.m.
*An intoxicated fellow named River wanted help pulling up his pants at 8:12 p.m. in the 24300 block of Redwood Hwy. Another call came in at 9:13 p.m. because the drunk still needed assistance with his britches.
Saturday, Oct. 8
*A motorcyclist, 50, died at 7:29 p.m. after he was ejected from a red Harley Davidson and through a fence in the 4100 block of Lakeshore Drive.
*A young driver, 15, practiced driving her new car on their dirt road in the 400 block of Ridge Vista Drive at 7:31 p.m. A neighbor didn’t recognize the vehicle, shot at the terrified girl, and put a bullet hole through the rear of her blue Toyota 4Runner. Naham Harris was detained in JCJ, charged with unlawful use of a weapon, menacing, and recklessly endangering another. Cash and multiple firearms were found hidden in his residence and in the woods around the property.